Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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