I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
