Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
