For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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