theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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