I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize