Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
