Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
someone owes me an orgasm
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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