nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
you would pick up someone in the library
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize