It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i think i have herpe
just one?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
