Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
