I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
