Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Randomize
