Who wears a wallet chain?!
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize
