so that wasnt chicken after all
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
