do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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