The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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