Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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