false alarm. still invincible.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize