i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
