He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
