dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Randomize
