How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize