I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
