There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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