$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
