no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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