As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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