hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
