Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
