Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
