the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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