I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
high people should be assigned attendants
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
