ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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