You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
