Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
And then my night got REAL pukey
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
