He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
this just has baby written all over it
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize
