Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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