She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
