I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Panties = found
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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