so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Randomize