MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Damn victory sex feels great
Randomize
