Dual....:-)
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
