I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
