Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Randomize
