Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
