is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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