she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
