DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
