I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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